The Little Man goes to bed on the early side, so we have rarely (if ever) taken him out to dinner. But lunch and breakfast? He has been all over town! Sometimes he is asleep for these adventures but sometimes not. Sometimes he sits quietly in his car seat. Sometimes he gets fussy, and one of us has to stand up and bounce him around. Sometimes he is happy, but loud, cooing and giggling. If he is inconsolable, we take him outside. If he is just “expressing himself,” we don’t.
On Easter Sunday we took him to breakfast. We sat on an outdoor sidewalk patio at a semi-nice place ($10 breakfast entrees). The restaurant itself was empty, but ten patio tables were full. One customer had his dog with him. Little Man was about six months old at the time. He was very happy, and showing it.
While we were waiting for the check, a new group took the table next to us. Little Man continued with his happy squeals while his dad lifted him in the air over and over again (see picture). The group next to us began talking loudly (clearly for our benefit) about how children have no discipline and parents let them do whatever they want and it must be a “west coast thing”. Little Man did not appreciate their comments.
They didn’t discourage us, though. Here’s us on Father’s Day, causing a Ruckus again.
Well, you can probably guess where I come out on this. I plan to continue living my life and bringing my Little Man along for the ride. What do you all think? Should we hide out at home until our children are old enough to understand rules and “appropriate” behavior?
Bunny Bites 
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August 19, 2009 at 9:47 am
Mommy Melee
I think babies can seriously go just about anywhere. If they get randomly disruptively loud, you can always step out. But I’ve learned that I’m usually WAY more aware of noise than those around me.
We’ve found a few restaurants that are consistently kid friendly and we try to stick to those. That would be my recommendation. (Nice sports-themed restaurants are usually loud enough, for example.)
August 19, 2009 at 9:53 am
jenbshaw
In my opinion the only way they will every learn “acceptable” behavior is to be out there (in public places). I say keep taking him out and about. If people are annoyed by a happy baby they should be kicked in the shins.
August 19, 2009 at 9:53 am
Tatiana
We’ll continue bringing our daughter with us anywhere we think is child-friendly enough. Obviously not into a sports bar at night or an upscale wine bistro, but the “all you can eat sushi” place? Yeah, she’s coming with us.
I know that when I didn’t have a kid, I didn’t appreciate people bringing their “disruptive” offspring into someplace I was trying to enjoy myself. That attitude is outdated and selfish, and I feel horrible about it now.
August 19, 2009 at 9:55 am
MommyGeekology
Take him out. They can go anywhere! Seriously. There are some great family friendly restaurants, and I wouldn’t suggest taking him out past his bedtime to a black tie event, but seriously — especially at this age, anything is game. Just make sure you have plenty of supplies, incl. baby spoon, your own food for him, sippy cup, toys, whatever, I just never count on the restaurant to have what I need.
As for annoying and rude and clearly never-going-to-be-good-parents patrons sitting nearby? They can suck it. If you kid is happy and not throwing a tantrum and disturbing everyone, I say seriously, people: SUCK IT.
I’m with Mommy Melee — family friendly restaurants are great — and that doesn’t just limit you to Friendly’s or Bickfords. There are plenty of nicer places that are friendly to families, you’ll find them as you go along, and you’ll naturally migrate to them because you’ll find it’ll be easier to handle Bunny at them. They’ll have diaper changing stations, cleaner bathrooms, and waitresses who don’t mind bringing your kid’s food (As they get older) with the appetizers, or picking up the toy that the boy threw just as they walked up 😉
Oh, and as a waitress of 3 years…. I like to tip a little extra if my kids have made a huge mess at the table and I just can’t take the time to clean it all up.
August 19, 2009 at 10:10 am
Aunt Baaa
I have tried it all. Our son was great and we could take him anywhere. Yes, he would let out the occasional war whoop, but for the most part, he was well-behaved. Also, my husband was so paranoid about disrupting other diners, that he would whisk him out the moment things started to turn ugly.
Our daughter has been a whole other animal. She tends to assess the situation, notice that others are being quiet, and immediately start squealing like someone is pinching her. This then incites her brother to do the same, and, well, you can do the math from there.
We are the family that dines and dashes (don’t worry we don’t skip on the bill). We eat and get the hell out of Dodge.
I am of the opinion that if you are human and you want to go to a restaurant, or fly on a plane or go to the movies, you are going to have to interact with other people. Some of these people will be small and sticky and yell constantly. Guess what, we were all kids. We were all kids that sometimes acted like assholes, but we got over it. The way we got over it was by going out and learning how to handle it.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t take the little heathen to a five star restaurant and then get huffy when I get the stink eye. We stick to Red Robin, Islands, etc. that are more family oriented. I still get the stink eye, but that is life. Some people just don’t get it and never will. Oh well. I have found that the staff of the restaurants are fantastic, it is the other patrons that can be stinkers.
Try taking a ziplock bag and squirting a little ketchup and mustard inside. It works like finger paints, without the mess and will keep him happy until food comes!
Good luck and you are not alone! We have all been relegated to what I call “The Diaper Ghetto” at some point.
August 19, 2009 at 10:12 am
Jaded Perspective
Unless the place is really swanky (which we wouldn’t go to anyway) you can take your kids. I am so sick of people making others with children and babies feel like they are being disturbed. It happened to me last weekend in fact. We were at Uno’s (Pizza/Burger Joint) and my 2yo was what I would consider ‘out of control.’ So we took turns walking him around until he calmed down. Then he started making his animal sounds to show off. Oh boy the looks we got. I actually told a woman (sitting with two 8 or 9 year olds) how nice it must be that she had already forgotten what this phase was like and to enjoy her $9 meal. I know it may seem like a bit much, but come on, we weren’t at disturbing someone’s $200 Anniversary Lobster dinner. If you want ambiance, go pay for it somewhere.
I take my son with me, because I have to eat. If other people don’t like it, too bad. I know there is a line and when he starts making a rucus I do what I can to calm the situation. Granted, we will be dining at home this weekend though. Because right now, it’s just more work for me and I don’t get to eat anyway!
I agree with Jen too, how will they learn is we keep them isolated? You will be judged if you do and judged if youdon’t in this society. Good luck.
August 19, 2009 at 10:28 am
Mandy @amndaj
Well, here is my east coast perspective:
My kids have been to most of the restaurants within a 20 min drive from my house. And they have been going since they were too little to pull out of the car seat. (These breaks are part of what help me keep my sanity.)
They are now pre-k and 2nd graders, and they are *awesome* at restaurants. They are super polite to the waiters/waitresses. They can amuse themselves until dinner comes. They know not to scream or jump around in the aisles. They have learned a little about reading and math to pay the bill. They are better patrons than half of the idiots/jerks I see out these days. Maybe this is because they are of a certain temperament, or not too hyper, or are just well trained. But either way, they are smart enough to know that it is just effin’ rude to talk about the people in the next table over.
Good for you for staying and not letting them get to you.
August 19, 2009 at 10:31 am
Gala
I think you need to learn from your experiences with your child. If he/she isn’t crying/throwing/climbing all over the place, go for it. But, if you have a child that is usually cranky then you aren’t doing anyone any favors by going out to eat–and that includes the child.
You must remember YOU think your precious is God’s gift to humanity, but everyone else in the restaurant doesn’t. I went out to eat enough times with my kids when they were little to learn that staying at home was a much better idea for all involved.
It is hard sometimes as a new parent to not get all self-rightious about your new role, but you are not any more “special” then people that choose to not have children, or choose to leave them at home when going out to eat.
Wow…I think I sound like a B*….and I’m really not 🙂
August 19, 2009 at 10:38 am
Lynda
Wow! Kids should be anywhere their parents are unless there are adult themes or the establishment is adults-only! Those who can’t take baby giggles should probably only go to restaurants for the 18+ crowd only. I do agree that parents have a responsibility to make sure their child is acting appropriately, however what you describe was no worse than ANY other group of people dining in a restaurant with or without kids.
August 19, 2009 at 10:50 am
Kristen
We’ve brought our son just about everywhere we normally would go. Yes kids make noise, but I’ve heard adults make a ton of noise too, completely worry free about if they’re bothering the people next to them. We took our son to a fancy Italian restaurant once. I actually apologized to the waiter for how loud he was (normal baby stuff, not crying or anything) but he said it was fine, that they were kid friendly. It wasn’t until then that I looked around and saw that about half the tables had kids. Unfortunately I think no matter where you go you run the possibility of meeting people who think kids shouldn’t be allowed anywhere but Micky D’s or Chuck E Cheese. Don’t let them bother you. Continue taking your kid anywhere you go.
August 19, 2009 at 11:14 am
Jennifer
jenbshaw is right on! How can they learn appropriate behavior without experience? From what I can tell,the parents who keep their kids away from public places have a hrder time getting them to listen when they finally do go out. Getting them out there and teaching them how to behave in public places is a good thing.
August 19, 2009 at 1:51 pm
Hannah
I think you should most certainly NOT hide out at home. That table should have asked their waiter NOT to be seated by an infant. I personally do not care for children and if I am being directed towards a table beside one with children, I ask for a different one.
Simple enough.
August 20, 2009 at 8:50 pm
Stephanie
Count me in with the ‘bring baby everywhere’ group! That’s how they learn, and you can’t just live under a rock while they’re little. Most people probably enjoy it- I know we get a lot of smiles usually when we go out, even at the quieter steak place we like.